Wednesday, 16 March 2011

Dinosaur cake

This was a special cake so took a lot of time preparing and will need a fair few ingredients.

You will need:

100g butter,
100g caster sugar,
100g self raising flour,
Vanilla essence,
Pinch of salt,
1 Genetics division of a multi-billion dollar corporation,
1 fossilised mosquito containing blood from a specific dinosaur,
1 PhD in advance bio-chemistry,
2 medium eggs.

With your ingredients follow this simple recipe;

1. Extract the DNA of the dinosaur in my case a Apatosaurus (Brontosaurus to use the obsolete name for this species), then complete the structure using simple frog DNA.

2. Cultivate the DNA into a cellular form and multiply to form an egg that will later develop into an egg (see opposite).

3. When the baby Dinosaur hatches let it grow for a few days and then when it is optimum cake size cover it in liquid hot metal and using liquid nitrogen cooled very quickly to produce a mould for the cake, discard any remnants of the dinosaur experiment, you don't want some fat guy stealing all your embryos.

4. Make the cake by mixing the ingredients that don't involve making an actual breathing dinosaur together.

5. Bake in the oven for 40 min to an hour and then let cool before topping with green icing and other decorations and then you have.......

....... A DINOSAUR CAKE!!!!!!

WARNING! life has an annoying habit of finding a way so to deal with that follow the simple procedure shown below...

Remember life finds a way but a knife finds a better way.

Thursday, 24 February 2011

Chocolate and Pecan cookies

MMMmmmmm, nothing taste better than some corperate espionage.
For this recipe you will need:
1 rival blogger
200g chocolate , broken into squares
100g butter , chopped
50g light muscovado sugar
85g golden caster sugar
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 egg , beaten
100g whole pecans
100g plain flour
1 tsp bicarbonate of soda
1 very low moral compass (can't emphasise how much this is needed)

1. Hope a rival posts what they are going to do before they actually post the thing. Then take a picture and recipe of whatever they are making and post it before, e.g.,

2. Heat oven to 180C/fan 160C/gas 4. Melt 85g chocolate in the microwave on High for 1 min or over a pan of simmering water.

3. Beat in the butter, sugars, vanilla and egg until smooth, then stir in three-quarters of both the nuts and remaining chocolate, then the flour and bicarbonate of soda.

4. Heap 12 spoonfuls, spaced apart, on 2 baking sheets (don't spread the mixture), then poke in the reserved nuts and chocolate. Bake for 12 mins until firm, then leave to cool on the sheets. Can be stored in a tin for up to 3 days.

5. Sit back and take credit if they then post their blog claim they stole the idea from you.

Enjoy yourself bloggers :)

Saturday, 12 February 2011

Banana Cake

Okay for those who actuallly want to find out recipies for baked goods when they come to this site, here comes a proper post.

Banana cake is a very simple recipe, for this you will need:
2 large, ripe bananas, about 400g in total, weighed with their skins on
250g self-raising flour
1 tsp baking powder
4 tbsp sugar
6 tbsp sunflower oil
6 tbsp semi-skimmed milk
2 eggs
120g sultanas

Firstly take the........ you're not even paying attention are you? No you just came here for cute pictures of Otters promoting drinks..... sigh.... here you go...

Tuesday, 1 February 2011

Cakecuccino - Coffee cake

A delicious mixture of cake and a favorite morning drink. This was a terrible terrible idea, i got confused over the recipe and thought that pouring coffee over a cake would be a good idea. It was an utter failure, there was not even any point in taking pictures, I wased my time, a cup of coffee, a nice cake and your time reading this. Here is a picture of an otter advertising diet pepsi to make up for this.

Thursday, 27 January 2011

Delcious Chocolate Cake

Mmmmmmmmmmm look at it. its a delcious chocolate cake.

What do you want? me to tell you how to make it? Hell no its my cake i provided a picture, you cant expect more of me. Just because i post something that says delicious chocolate cake doesnt mean i have to say how to make it. Go get your own cake!

Monday, 24 January 2011

All new recipe! steam cakes!

Betterccino has been operating in two different years now (2010 and 2011) so the likelyhood of people visiting my first stuff is unlikely because its a small hastle. so i can now post old blogs and claim them to be new without the hastle of thinking and doing stuff, yay. so here is my new(wink) steamed cakes!

When it comes to baking the vast majority of people would say that a key componant to the whole process is a working oven, I do not follow this idea. Due to the oven breaking and a need for baked goods when my friends come over for our 'Movie Mondays' i had to devise a way to provide the necessary baked goods.

My system revolves around harnessing the power of steam where by i will basically boil a cake. Some rival bakers will scrutinise this system and if face with a similar problem will try and find easy solutions like grilling cakes.

I decided that to start off i would make simple cakes that would be a good example to my friends that this was a system of baking worth investing in.

Following the recipe and adding sugar, 2 eggs and butter into a bowl before mixing thouroughly. Then adding flour to the mixture and a dash of vanilla, then mixing together to make the perfect mixture for the cakes.

I then proceeded to give out equal quantaties to each cake.

The next part would be the most complicated and trickiest that only experienced bakers like myself would preform, it was time to boil the cakes.

I added heated water to a pan and the placed the cake in a sieve then placed it in the pan and carefully put the lid over the sieve so that the steam wouldn't escape so eaisily and the cake wou;ld cook in a faster time. the whole process took about 15 to 20 minuites, and at the end of it we had 7 loverly cakes, more would have been made but only 3 people were attending our movies nightt this week out of usually 6+ guests.

After the cakes were done and left for a little while to cool i decided that instead of icing the top as was common practice by our preivious baker i would go in a different direction and instead top my cakes off with loverly ice cream.

Below is the finished outcome of my work and one of my friends enjoying his steamed treat. helping to prove the supieriority of steaming over traditional baking.

and now to finish it off with some harmless self promoting visit for all your Homer stories and if you dont follow this or the linked blog do so or else you're just a hipster.

Thursday, 13 January 2011

My Very Own Roast Potatoes

Here is my own unique reciepe for roast potoatoes, which is clearly my own and i did fully myself as you shall clearly see from my description of how i did it.

Firstly you will need to cut up one potatoe and have 3 full potoatoes as well, yes that seems right.
Step 2 chop up some garlic and like with the potatoes leave some whole bits.
step 3: put some er grass and other green things into a dish that i would guess from the picture can hold 4 litres of water.

Finally add the potatoes which if magic is on your side like it clearly was mine will all now be chopped up. and cook in the over for lets guess 3 hours.
and that is my own special roast potatoes reciepe, dont believe me look at the pictures for proof, yeah that told you!